Armored (2009)

ARMORED (2009) - ***

ARMORED is the sort of basic and functional old school B-actionsploitation vehicle, mind the pun, that Walter Hill could have directed back in the day. In fact, Hill did tell a similar story with his watchable TRESPASS, which like ARMORED also had a good cast. Except instead of firemen and gangs fighting over a stash of gold in an abandoned factory, ARMORED has a bank truck crew of disillusioned desperate men plan "the perfect heist," then turn against each other over in an abandoned factory. When anyone in a movie draws up a flawless crime, you're fucked much like somebody saying he's close to retirement. Just don't do it.

Director Nimrod Antal (VACANCY, the upcoming PREDATORS) does a fine job of being patient about letting the plot wind itself up without much contrived nonsense. A common mistake many filmmakers commit stuffing too much artificial plotting in their pictures because they fear they don't have "enough." Antal sets up the situation with the guys, blue collar drinking buddies paid minimum wage by shifts to protect thousands and millions of our money in every transport and delivery. Not all their stories are told, but we quickly infer from following leader-later-villain Matt Dillon and protegee-turned-hero Columbus Short, they're all tired of being the underpaid and underrespected "people you depend on[/i]," as the prophet Tyler Durden would preach.

Short especially has the biggest grudge against society, and needs the bread. A decorated silver star soldier who returned from Iraq to find lacking career prospects, two dead parents, a house with two mortgages, and a little delinquent brother to take care of. I am surprised by this Short fellow, I mean who is he? According to IMDB, Short was previously a dancer who appeared in YOU GOT SERVED, later became an actor in the comedy ACCPETED, the direct to video sequel SAVE THE LAST DANCE 2, horror entry QUARANTINE, the music drama CADILLAC RECORDS, and played the lead in another dance flick, STOMP THE YARD. So yeah I was pleasantly surprised by this Short guy. I'll quit the puns. Without much script help, he naturally comes off as likeable, reasonable hard-working guy trying his best to do the right thing when the chips are against him.

The best scene in ARMORED has actually nothing to do with the plot, but when Short comes home from work to find his brother spray painting a giant eagle mural in the kitchen, cans all over the table. He's got no job, how can he afford this paint? Short is angry and pissed naturally, maybe more by the kid's lack of remorse, the kid says he stole the cans from school. Then Short calms down, and is glad that at least the boy is going to school. He does love him. Later when the upper-middle class white woman bust Short's balls about being a bad parent and indirectly disparaging the kid, Short points to the kitchen mural and defends his brother as a great "misunderstood" artist. Man I fucking love that. It's hard to such genuine non-action moments usually in most such routine junk.

But back to the action, and I must kinda admire the plot's intentional limited scope. After the gang goes to the factory to grab the cash, where they would start their scam of being hijacked by phantom robbers, a homeless guy witnesses them. In panic they kill him, and Short isn't down for this bullshit. Nobody was supposed to get hurt, thus he locks himself in the steel armored bulletproof truck with the money. The engines is trashed, the alarms are cut, and stuck in a dead zone. He's stuck as they slowly chisel and hammer their way through. Short's got to live for the next 50 minutes, when the next shift begins, and the company will alert authorities when the crew fails to report in.

If I am to go pretentious, I could argue ARMORED as an allegory of Iraq. You have an unarmed guy surrounded, outmanned and outarmed by his adversaries, who have guns, knives, fire, and other hurtful weapons. He must use stealth and smarts to fight off the brash and braun, and doesn't help that this includes Morpheus, Leon the Professional, Dally Winston, and Fernando Sucre from PRISON BREAK. The mastermind and his perpetrators thought a simple plan, yet when it goes up in smoke and no longer relevant, they're forced to think on their feet. Most of their dealing with unexpected obstacles are what causes most of their problems, and the hero exploits them. By the end, the remaining baddies stay dedicated in getting that cash, but by their eyes you could tell that they know they're probably screwed anyway.

I suppose there must be a leap of disbelief accepting Short is able to sneak out of the truck twice while the other guys are too busy with the slamming or can't hear because of them, but then again who thought 6 six years and a Presidential administration ago, we would still be stuck in two fucking deserts? Alright that's a poor excuse.

In most such siege movies you have the antagonist tries to reason or negotiate a way out for the protagonist, so I like how Dillon makes a very compelling argument to Short of why he should cooperate or die. I'm certain a good portion (i.e. most) of the ARMORED audience I saw it with would have agreed with Dillon, at least that's my impression. Asides from many men willing to kill you for the government lettuce, the stiff is a hobo, Dillon is right that nobody will care about him. Since Short is an accessory to a murder, shooting a cop, and attempted robbery, telling the cops could possibly land him in jail, and little bro goes to foster care. Just go along, bury the corpse, do the job, save your house, everything will be fine. You've got to do some evil for some good. Yet Short insists in his defiance in spite of the possible personal consequences and drags the blood drenched badge to safety in the truck because...shock...it's the right thing to do.

Which leads to the ending, and maybe Dillon was right to a degree. Now many a movie involving robberies try to wrap things up by somehow getting the targeted survivor in possession of the loot, or a good juicy slice. ARMORED says fuck that. Instead we have Short informally honored by the police (if not passionately) with a handshake in a hospital hallway. His boss Fred Ward shares his gratitude, and drops word of a "possible" reward. See even the people who's money was rescued by Short, while also preventing a major crime and saving a blue boy's life, aren't fully gracious of his efforts. Good boy, you did your job. Now fetch me my slippers. But Short seems satisfied and content with himself anyway,

I enjoyed ARMORED, but something was definately missing something. What exactly, I don't know. TRESPASS had the same problem. Most executives would compensate with a useless romantic interest (ARMORED has no female characters) or expand the plot to other locations, but both would have detracted from what makes ARMORED work. ARMORED is alot like CLIFFHANGER, both movies walking the tightrope between watchable but disposable and a genuine recommendable experience. I guess perhaps its that CLIFFHANGER has a few pleasing memorable (if ridiculous) choreographed action scenes, and ARMORED doesn't.

When ARMORED comes to your local budget theatre, go see it. Or use Netflix. Either way, it'll match such expectations. And surpass those you would hold for a Nimrod.